A year or more ago, Karena invented a board game. This was, i think, right after she went to Pax East. She spent a lot of time researching game design, and how much it would cost to create her own actual board, and studying my old Dungeons and Dragons books for ideas. The game involved moving your guy around these kingdoms and conquering them. You could lose ones you’d already conquered to other players. There was something about needing gold and followers in order to conquer. She called it “Urst”. This name came to her in a dream.
Me: That’s a pretty good name for it.
Karena: YOU REALLY THINK SO?
Me: Yeah, it rhymes with “Worst” hahaha
Honestly though, it was pretty good. The first time we played was basically playtesting and I came up with a lot of things wrong with it (at her request) and gave her the list. The biggest flaw was this shop where your character could buy items.
Me: Wait, so this potion makes my guy invincible in battle and it only costs twenty gold? I’ll buy ten of them!
She’s pretty bad at game economics.
I don’t know, after she fixed the flaws, we played it a couple more times and that was it. Not sure whether playtesting a game makes it less fun to play later; a board drawn on a large sheet of paper with pencil & characters that are little folded bits of paper attached to paperclips make it less fun; or it just got kind of buried when we moved and we forgot about it.
Recently she got working on a new game. Rex and I saw her with my old AD&D Monster Manual (oh sure you made fun of me for owning/keeping it now it’s a reference book for you huh) making little cards like “Hill Giant +10”. And then we started making fun of her. Then…
Me: So are we playing your new game tonight?
Karena: NO. I QUIT MAKING IT BECAUSE YOU GUYS WERE JERKS.
Maybe it is a pregnancy thing. So to be on the safe side…
Me: We’re sorry! We really want to play it!
Rex: We do! We love you Mom!
Me: Don’t cry! (she wasn’t)
Rex [hugging her forcefully]: Yeah, don’t cry!
Instead she made a new game. I am pretty sure this was punishment for making fun of Urst II or whatever.
Familyopoly has two jars filled with slips of paper. One jar had “newlywed game” questions like “What is Dad’s favorite color?” The other had “challenges” like “roll a dice and steal that many points from another player” and “Can you find three books that have been left out and reshelve them in less than a minute?”
Highlights from the game:
- This is exactly something that Susan Heffley (the mom from diary of a wimpy kid) would create. (btw if you want to know what characters the rest of the family would be, rex=rowlee, quincy=manny, and when it comes my attitude towards this game, i’m rodrick.
- I didn’t know what Rex’s scout troop number was, the name of any of his Hot Wheels cars, or the name of Karena’s stuffed animal. I also pretended not to remember where Karena and I met. As for the latter, as amusing as it was, sometimes you can pretend too well to be dumb and then no one will believe later that you were just trying to be funny.
- A “pictionary” challenge – Rex had to pick something for Karena to draw that I had to guess. I guessed “Poop” before she made a single mark on the paper. Correct. Guess I know at least something about him.
- A card that said “if dad has complained more than five times about the game you get three points”
- It ended in a nauseating (to me) and satisfying (to Karena and Rex) three-way tie. To be fair i think she derived a good bit of pleasure out of torturing me with this game.
Perhaps the worst thing was the following night when it was Rex’s turn to pick the family game and he chose Familyopoly.
Me: NO! It doesn’t make any sense! We already know the answers to the trivia questions. We’ve done all the challenges. It’s the kind of game you’re only supposed to play once.
Karena: YOU’RE JUST JEALOUS THAT HE LIKES MY GAME. BESIDES HE ADDED SOME NEW CARDS.
Rex added “Who has the best ears in the family” and copied several other cards verbatim. Karena won this time, which congratulations, finally – I mean, you wrote the trivia questions (except for the ears one)
Squat: 45×4,135×3, 225×2, 280,285×6, 290×5, 295×4, 300,305,310×3
Pause Med Grip Bench: 45x10p, 135×4, 225×3, 270×2, 275,280,285,290,295,300,305×1
Sumo+monster: 135×2, 225,315,330x1
BTN press: 135×2, 140,145,150x1
RDL: 225×3, 240×6
Front Squat: 45×4, 135×3, 225,235,240,245×2, 250,255,260,265×1
Bench: 45x10p, 135×4, 225×3, 255×4, 260,265,270,275,280,285×3
Sumo+lite band: 135,225,275,315x1
Mil press: 125×6, 130×5, 135×4, 140,145×3, 150×2