Social Fail

Attractive redhead at the gym.  (I’ve seen her from time to time but not in a while and not mentioned her on my blog b4).  She’s probably in her early or mid 40’s.  Wearing very short black spandex shorts, and a tanktop with some sort of sports bra thing visible underneath in the armpit region.  Thin – maybe a little too thin. I dunno, my story is that she is determined to keep her BW at 110 lbs; maybe she used to be fat; maybe she has maintained this weight since high school.  So IMO she’d look better at 115 but no one here would not fuck her based on her looks.  A good four word description of her would be “your friend’s hot mom”.  That is, if you’re a teenager.  Otherwise, think back to your friend with the hottest mom when you were 15.  Got it?  Okay, moving along…

She’s working out nearby, and I’m checking her out.  Especially when she’s doing leg presses and those shorts are climbing even higher. 

Anyway, I’m about to do a set of behind-the-neck press.  (bar is on the floor, I have to DL, hang clean and push press it into position, you know the drill). I broke another pair of headphones, so I’m wearing a pair of my wife’s that kind of wrap around the back of your neck rather than the top of your head.  So they’re a pain in the ass and I have to remove them to do BTN press – at least for singles. I’ve just taken them off and am chalking my hands, when I hear a woman’s voice from behind me.

So did you do that meet in [another state] like four weeks ago?

I know it’s her bc the gym is pretty empty.  I actually consider pretending that I don’t hear her and just setting up to lift   But I decide that’s a pretentious thing to do.  I mean it’s a 154 lb btn press single.

So I turn around and we have this interaction:

Me: Uh, no.

Her: Because my friend did it, but he got disqualified for not holding the weight up long enough.

[She may have been talking about a weightlifting meet – or maybe a deadlift???

Me: Oh.

[I set up to do my clean, but then I realize that was not an adequate response]

Me: Oh yeah?  That’s, uh, too bad.

[Now I realize that it’s hard to talk in this position, and also foolish to  stay crouched down like this and try to have a conversation]

Her: Well, I see you’re busy.

At this point, she walked away quickly.  I did my single, and then looked around for her.  My feelings were conflicted:

I feel bad for being so brusque.  OTOH, fuck her, leave me alone, I’m trying to lift.  But I talk to other guys.  But not during my sets.  I might have treated a high school nerd the same way, and that’s okay because I’m married and not trying to bang her.  On the other hand, I like pretty gym girls and often wish that they would talk to me during my workout (actually I wish that they would sit on my face during my workout). Now one comes up to chat with me and I act worse than any of the tongue-tied mopers that I’ve ever tried to advise online.  What would Fatman say? He’s probably the most normal guy I know.  “She was just trying to be friendly” That sounds reasonable.  I’ll go over and exchange some pleasantries with her and then get back to my workout.

I didn’t see her but figured she might be in the stretching area.  It’s near the water fountain.  My water bottle was full so I drank it down a bit and strolled over.  Of course she was not there, she had probably left the gym.


Low Bar Squat: 45×6, 45bbx5, 135bbx4, 225bbx3, 315bbx2, 365bb, 405, 435, 445; 370x10x3

BTN Press: 45×8, 89×4, 109×3, 129×3, 144×2, 154, 159, 164; 135x4x3

Sumo+average band: 5 sets, all PRs, up to 270 off 3″ deficit

Time: 2 hours

gonna take tomorrow off

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26 thoughts on “Social Fail

  1. Today I told the receptionist girl that’s close to my age at the front desk I liked anime and specifically Gundam. She asked if Zelda was anime and said her guy friends like anime. Conversation came up because there were flatscreen TV boxes behind her and I started conversation about new TVs for the gym and said I haven’t watched TV in like 2 years.

    Later I had hot coffee that was now cold coffee from church and asked her for 2 ice cubes and she got me them and then she accidentally splashed coffee in my face.

    So I think I win this time around.

    • the ice cube thing is no biggy. The TV thing is funny though
      but listen, one of my world-famous analogies – I complain about tripping and spraining my ankle on my blog and a guy with one leg comes through to story-top me.

  2. Who fucjing cares it’s one interaction? That’s where the mope comes in. Not from fucking up a social interaction, which happens to most everybody all the time, but actually thinking it matters. The perfectly fine, perfectly healthy response is to just make a little extra effort to have a positive interaction next time you see her.

    Also, fuck her for talking to you when you’re getting ready to lift. I’ve got these three Asians who must be out of school for the summer doing sheiko and taking up my rack and platform all damn day(sorry celica). And they see I’m slightly stronger than average so they find some excuse to ask me an asinine question every time. Just finish your 8 million sets of triples and get out of my way. My real answer to your question is no one in the world should be doing block pulls with 275 on the bar.

    But no its actually fine, the timing has been good and they get out of my way by the time my wife and I warm up. I just like to act tough on the internet. My wife even asked me why they are doing all that when they aren’t as strong as me and I said yeah its silly but if they are enjoying it that’s all that really matters anyway.

    • “Just finish your 8 million sets of triples and get out of my way.”

      I used to feel those feels.

      In my case it was little scowling fatsos doing Starting Strength, five fives in the extreme squatmourning, then five fives in the press (BC everyone knows you can’t press outside the rack). Taking five minutes between sets, because squatting 275 takes a lot out of you, of course.

      And there were two guys who I suspected of Sheiko-ism (eleven sets of triples, bench and squat on the same day). Same general strength levels as the SS Miscers, but overall a more friendly attitude and less preachy to guys weaker than they are.

      But I came to accept that. Those dudes pay to go to the gym, just like I do, and when you sum it all up, the stuff they’re doing makes no more or less sense than what I’m doing, since neither of us are competing. Plus if I wanted to train powerlifting I’d go to a PL gym and see how I compare to… you know, actual PLers. So by getting pissed at them I was really getting pissed at myself. TL; DR; find peace with yourself, karma something zen.

      • little scowling fatso here. i think i could be accused of Sheiko-ism based on your description. Also, I agree with your last paragraph in theory. Like a racist who believes that “all men are created equal”. I think I do a lot to discourage squatting in my gym by using the power rack for 1/6-1/8 of the total time the gym is open.
        I hate how SS guys press in the rack too.

        • …and this is why you’re cursed with Sheiko Asians.
          karma something zen.
          .
          .
          .
          i used to press in the rack but stopped but only because I started doing squats at the same time and there were not enough racks for that.

          • I’ll press in the rack too, but only when no one’s waiting to use it.

            I sit on the benches and curl dumbbells too when the gym is empty.

        • Rack Presser checking in, I only do it because if I clean it and then start pressing a lot of times I begin to pass out if I’m going heavyish at all. Plus the ONE rack at my gym is rarely used unless its for quarter squatting 225 so I don’t feel too guilty about it.

          • like you guys said, it’s totally cool if no one is waiting to squat.
            but when i’m squatting 350+ on a slippery wood platform with metal weights so I can’t dump it, and this cocksucker is pressing 95 next to me in the rack and texting in between sets, i’ll totally fucking walk up to him and ….

            …politely ask, “excuse me, how many more sets do you have left.”

    • i get my blood pressure up when I see people using the rack when I want to lift even if I know that they’re going to do 3 sets and then leave. I feel your pain.
      also like the contrasting advice in 2 consecutive sentences:
      “The perfectly fine, perfectly healthy response is to just make a little extra effort to have a positive interaction next time you see her.”
      and
      “Also, fuck her for talking to you when you’re getting ready to lift.”

      love: ” …actually thinking it matters.” good mope-analysis

  3. no matter. what use is other people in the gym, unless they’re spotting you? your primary reason for being in a gym is, probably, not to make lots of new friends.

    remember what you didn’t like and do it different next time. that’s all there is to it. your internet brigade loves you.

      • probably belongs on mopililty as a follow up to the other article about Brett’s “incident” but here you go:

        Feds: “Moper” Weightlifting Cult Membership List “Surprising”

        […] the identification of user “RadBromance” as professional bodybuilder and Mr. Olympia titlist Jay Cutler has sent shockwaves through the bodybuilding community […]

        […] Perhaps most stunning was the revelation that at least one user was a law enforcement official actively engaged in investigating the mopility site. User “Fatman”, identified as Richmond, VA police detective Bart Cummings, 34, had been a member for over 3 years, and among the most frequent posters – yet was unable to prevent the tragedy. Richmond police spokesman Caryl Wofford refused to comment on the case, but said that an internal investigation was underway. At least one journalist, Skip Marchant of the Virginia Beach Courier, has called for Cummings’ resignation and prosecution. “I’ve read through the entire 2 TB dump of that site, every post and comment…this guy’s conduct is inexcusable. You have him riling up the other users, cozying up to Kim. At some point he crossed a line where arguing about whether weightlifting was inherently homosexual became more important than doing his job to keep the public safe. […]

  4. So yesterday hot tall gym clerk girl my age turned the lights off in the hallway to the locker room. I called her and said I still need to go to the locker room. She starts walking down the stairs and I’m stretching out on the rails (quads) .And she says “I’m scared of the dark and don’t like going down these stairs alone.” So I just sat there stretching for like 10 seconds as she walks down the stairs and my reply back to her was “oh…” It took til she was like halfway down the stairs to realize this was a flirty gesture then I finally went down the stairs, jumping down like 5 steps at a time like depth drops to catch up.

  5. Today a gym acquaintance came in with literally a binder full of workout programs and told me he was gonna start 5/3/1. He knows that is what I am currently doing and wanted some more info that apparently wasn’t covered in his binder. He was working off of a supposed 240 bench max. He immediately throws 205 on the bar.
    “So, I’m gonna warm up with 205”
    “No, I’d probably warm up with 95”
    He does this and then wants to throw on 205. I explain that he should probably do a couple more lighter warm up sets and 205 is likely his top set.
    “So this sounds like it progresses pretty slow, huh?”
    “Yeah”
    “I’m just trying to put on as much muscle as possible before my wedding”
    “This might not be the best program for you, just drop the weights and start doing a bunch of smith machine half reps”
    “What if I do 5/3/1 for a month and then switch to 10/8/6 next month”
    “Um…yeah, this is more about slow progression, if you do that I don’t think you’re gonna really get much out of it”
    “Yeah, I think I’m gonna wait and I’ll do 5/3/1 later”
    He then proceeded to bench “using” straps and when I asked what he was doing he explained it was a “mental thing”….he’s also stronger than me.

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