The other people are just there.

I don’t know if I’m developing adult-onset autism, or I’m just a sociopath, but I had this interaction today…

First, quick backstory for new readers:  The little gray man is the guy who I yelled at for being passive-aggressive and asking me “So what, do you live at the gym?”  Crossfit Chris is the guy who squats 135×3 with excellent form and expensive shoes.

I saw LGM enter the gym, so I was glad that I was wrapping up my workout, and I headed to the locker room, studiously avoiding eye contact.  But then, LGM was there taking a piss at one of two urinals.  Why, guy?  You just started working out.  Why couldn’t you just pee before your workout like every other normal human? Now because of the way the place is laid out I could either stand there awkwardly, retreat, or go ahead and use the other one.  I chose to piss next to him.  CC walked by and saw me and struck up a conversation.  I don’t mind talking while I pee, either to fellow pee-rs or kibitzers.  Though, I understand that a lot of guys are uncomfortable with this, so I never strike up a conversation myself with someone who’s peeing.  LGM finished and went to wash his hands.  I guess the following conversation was colored by the fact that I knew he was listening and judging.

LGM (possible thoughts): Is this Ruiner guy really an aggro meathead loser?  Or does that fact that he’s friendly with almost everyone else mean that there’s something wrong with me?

CC: So, are you guys training heavy again today?

Me: What do you mean “you guys?”

CC: Don’t you always train with a buddy?

Me: No.  I train alone.  … The other people are just…there.

IDK, maybe he confused me with Andy and George who train together and both look like me.


Today’s Cherb Report: Emma was there without the other members of team Lone Star Barbell (Andy and George).  I considered mentioning that I saw pictures of her in her underwear on instagram #12weekTransformation #Paleo #strongHer, but decided that this would be awkward.  She approached me: “You squat sumo, right?” 

She was trying to squat “sumo”, like she used to a few months before the meet, and wanted me to check her form.  “Sumo” referring to squats grated my nerves unreasonably, but I explained to her, that yes, I had a wide stance, like her boyfriend.  But unlike deadlift, where 99% of people either pull sumo with a wide stance, or conventional, there is a lot of gray area in squatting, your foot position doesn’t have to be an either/or proposition between almost touching the rack or touching your heels together.

Checked her form.  It was good, except she needs Chucks for this, not a heeled shoe (she was wearing like a pink weightlifting shoe that is not actually a weightlifting shoe, but they started to give as she pushed her feet out).  Also told her that unlike a high-bar squat where you go down and then you come up, when you squat low-bar aka sumo you have to be a lot better judge of parallel bc going too low will just get you stuck in a hole with 80% of your max (trust me).  Finally said not to worry that they were a little harder than she expected because they work an entirely different set of muscles/skills than the kind of squats she was doing for the last 2 months.


Weight: 189 (-1.8)

Manta Ray Squat: 45×5, 135×4, 225×3, 315, 335, 345, 355, 360; 265x10x3

TSV: 7950

BTN Press: 45×6, 95×3, 115×2, 135×2, 145, 155, 160; 120x5x3

TBTNV: 1800

Sumo+Average Band: 9 sets, all PRs, up to 300 off a 1″ deficit.  Thinking about ordering the next size up in bands.

Chinups: 5×4 all slow and pulled my chest to the bar, feel the burn ah

Neck Harness: 25×20 got away from doing this for a while but I forgot how much I enjoy having a big neck, though really, not doing them for 2 months didn’t seem to hurt any when i see pics of my yoke.  I was up to IDK 65×10 or something before but I figured start back easy, it’s my fucking spine.

Time: 1:50

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19 thoughts on “The other people are just there.

    • at first i thought this is a crazy/sperger sentiment, but most people do basically move back and forth in the same three squares and say the same bubble of text each time you talk to them.

      OTOH, thinking other people are NPCs is the TLP definition of narcissism.

      So wait, Celica, you star in your own movie? You too, Swede? You mean you guys have feelings and goals and stuff too? Iike ones that don’t revolve around me? WTF.

      #howdareyou

      • have you seen the movie “cashback”? add moderate weightlifting and it sums up the essence of my life. low key, some odd but nice characters and the love story arc. it used to be more like “high fidelity” (I’m Rob, hi!). 🙂

        • just googled it. the chick on the cover is amazing

          and the review: “full of unlikable characters, messy editing, and gratuitous nudity”

          that’s some life, buddy!

  1. Poor LGM is just socially awkward and trying to make small talk, probably wants to make friends with the big fella. How long do you rest between sets? Do you not have time to interact with people between them? Then again it does bother me when someone forces me to take out my headphones to ask if I’m using the Body By Jake Ab Crusher on the other side of the gym or some shit like that so I at least kinda understand. Watched the videos. Andy is happy for the 92 year old man benching 100 lbs, why you gotta drink that Hatorade? I’m pretty sure you Andy and George are all the same person so I guess at least part of you is happy for him. Plz post link to instagram.

    Sometimes I kinda wish I didn’t have a workout partner. Maybe lifting with someone just one or 2 days a week would be nice. Having a workout partner really gets in the way of my listening to music and pacing back and forth between lifts. Plus I’ve found I actually lift less weight when we lift together since I am able to get more pumped up for a lift listening to music.

    Also, my workout partner refuses to read about whatever program we’re using, lifts we’re doing, or calculate his own weights despite me sending him multiple emails with links right to all of these things. Last week he intentionally loudly proclaimed that he wished there was an open rack right next to the skinny indian kid using the rack to do 95lb “box squats” not to the actual depth of the box. The other week some girl asked if we were using the 15 lb dumbells and he jokingly replied “No, that’s way too heavy for us” not realizing it was kind of insulting seeing as how that was the weight she was using. He did the same thing when some guy asked if we were using the bench that was loaded with 95 lbs….the guy then proceeded to struggle benching 95lbs…. I’m probably just jealous my workout partner has gotten stronger than me.

      • My workout partner is a pretty nice guy but since he’s started making progress he lets it go to his head every now and then. His “thats too heavy” comments are more like a nerdy middle school kid jokingly bragging than legitmately trying to be a dick.

        • just teach him to mope. i’m trying to teach BB John. He’s quite happy with his pudgy 18 inch arms and 385 lb not parallel squat and 300 lb bench press. So every once in a while I’ll let slip a “…losers like me [implied-and you too] who spend 2 hours a day at the gym…” or a “crap, time to get home so I can do the dishes while my wife yells at me. sigh” and he looks kind of scared like a (big) deer in headlights.

          • He doesn’t know enough to know his/our lifts aren’t impressive and when your heart is filled with Jesus’s love thou shalt never mope. Probably for the best, he’s a nice counterbalance to me. If your buddy is a bodybuilder he is probably already a moper like that dude in the movie Teddy Bear.

          • he’s like a bulky college-aged kid. i call him a bodybuilder bc he lifts mostly for size. i think he’s pretty happy with life because he seems to have a lot of friends, is good looking, and I assume gets hot girls. The world and the weight room is still his oyster.

    • 1. Let’s continue to use fake names and places here. This is why I edited your comment.

      2. I don’t really rest between my sets. I drink my dextrose, I do some band pulling, I log the set I just did, I fiddle with my mp3, then right onto the next set. But I don’t mind chatting between sets, especially early in the workout. It kind of depends on the person. LGM spoke to me twice and both times were rather passive-aggressive. PJ, on the other hand is so funny and bizarre that if I’m not careful I can waste away my time. Crossfit Chris is okay, he just really has nothing to say that I care about. Old people (40+) I don’t even want to take my headphones off for, but I’ll always nod to them and shout some kind of greeting when we make eye contact. Bodybuilder John, well, we have kind of a routine I’ll take my headphones off and he will and he’ll tell me a quick and amusing story and then I’ll do the same, Then we put our headphones back on and go to work.
      Andy is pretty good to talk to even though I sometimes get annoyed because he always says something like “you’re a beast!” or “I dunno how you do it, man” 4-5x per conversation. But besides that, I like him.
      George is a little harder to deal with, he’s a great guy and his wife is nice. He has a lot of questions and so I’m glad Andy took him under his wing. The other day he said to me “Man i’m 37, I’m getting really old, don’t you get really sore?” and I just had to be like “Uh no, well maybe next year it’ll hit me”

      3. Not to be rude but fuck a lot of questions. You want to know how I train, fine. You have a question about are you doing this right, fine. But a couple of guys at the gym fucking bombard me and they’re not gonna do my program and they’re not gonna pay me money and they’re gonna deadlift 315 forever and ask me questions like is sumo better and why do I use those bands and those mats and that’s why I try to avoid even looking at some folks.

      4. Fuck a workout partner, I’ve never had one and never want one. You guys are all the workout partners I need.

      • It sounds like you’re more social at the gym than some of your previous posts would suggest, I guess you just have a disdain for certain people and your interactions with those people are more interesting/fun to write about. I hear you on #3. The same girls have been asking me how to get in shape and lose weight multiple times a year FOR YEARS yet after 2 or 3 weeks of halfway following whatever advice I give them they go back to not working out and eating shit. “I ran a mile twice this week, thats pretty good right? I deserve a cheat week…yep, nothing but brownies and diet soda for me this week…. I don’t know why I’m not losing weight. I give up”.

        My bad on the names. You gonna join team LMFAO Barbell and make matching “Bees Mode” shirts.

        • yeah i am a little more social. it’s a persona. still i talk less than any other person at the gym, except for this guy on steroids and growth hormone who has maybe 22″ arms. he’s nice just quiet except he once flipped out on Porter last year at the powerlifting meet.

          anyway i digress. You will learn to never ever give a girl general fitness or diet advice. The thing to say is “oh man, i’d like to help you but I only know how to get big and bulky and bench a lot! don’t know nothin bout tonin and shapin and dietin”

          • That works if you’re 5’6 200 lbs but not if you’re 5’11 160.

          • hmm you have a point actually women don’t even ask me. i mean a lot of them ask me how to do an RDL or if they are squatting right but not about general how to be thin and fit. but believe me i got a lot of hilarious/mean/lewd answers for when they do.

            like my wife weighed herself the other day
            Her: I lost 5 pounds!
            Me: You’ve been losing the same 5 pounds for the last 4 years. Why don’t you try to lose a different 5 pounds?

          • Awesome wife response! The only time I check some girl’s squat or RDL form it’s completely unsolicited and done using multiple mirrors or quick glances so at least you’ve got that going for you.

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