Was pretty proud of Madcow. He had to lift in the 2nd flight which was mostly women and geezers. And he totalled 1000, which is lowly for a 181 pounder, but 6 months ago his total was like 600. He worked hard and made good linear progression and didn’t do anything stupid like forget to enter the meet. He went 8/9, and on his last deadlift, he had to do a PR of 430 to make his goal total. I gave him some placebo/magic feather coaching tips, slapped him on the back and sent him out there and he got it done. His wife and parents were watching and they were pretty excited for him. He’s like 25, 6′ and 175, so he has a lot of room to improve and should bump at least to the 198s very soon.
I expected some sort of dramatic confrontation with Porter and I expect many of my readers did too. The truth is that he was quite bearable to be around. He did not give me a single word of advice, and focused on his actual lifters – Emilio, his wife Nancy, Betsy the Bodypump lady, several high schoolers and himself. Three quick Porter stories which all served to further endear me to him:
1. I was telling him about the high schoolers who I yell at. Turns out they showed up during the meet while I was home and Porter yelled at them for doing box jumps in the free weight area. Before you get outraged, Celica, they were doing them from a bigger box to a smaller box and two or three of them were doing them at the same time.
2. I was telling him about Wolverine. Despite Porter’s awareness of imaginary Russian lifters, it astounded me that he did not know that W had totalled 1515 in this exact meet last year. Porter came up to me during the bench press and said that W was going to bench 400. I said that was unlikely since he’d opened with 315 and bench is his weakest lift. This seemed to puzzle Porter, but he agreed with me. I now suspect that all his other stories were more “confused old man” stories than “psyching you out to be an asshole” stories as well.
3. After Porter made his second bench, the announcer lady (Jimmy’s wife) announced loudly “A New World Record” When Porter made his way back to where I was sitting I said “Nice, man, another world record.” (50% trying to be nice, 40% genuine, 10% sarcastic) Porter just said “Bah. It’s just cause I’m old.”
There were no fourth attempts allowed. While I feel this screwed Wolverine and the other legit world-class athletes at the meet (no one), I was very thankful for this policy when I heard “A New World Record” being announced every third lift.
Bench – Jimmy the meet director said during the rules brief, “I’ll lift off to anybody. I’ll lift off to all eighty of you. I don’t mind.” The thing is, he was telling the truth. He lifted off to me last year. He’s only like 5’4 and IIRC has like a 630 multi-ply bench at 198 or something. I know this is a little friendless/unprofessional, like having to dance with the instructor. But not only does he give a good lift-off, he always reminds the lifter to wait for all the bench commands.
I was pretty in the zone. 325 was like a speed bench and 350 was easy too. Smoked 370 and probably had 375, even 380 in me.
As a side note, beat one of Porter’s elite bench crew. One of the guys who would train at our gym once a month and use the power rack to bench in. He only lifted raw, and did 335, then missed 370 for a world record twice. However, this was a dubious victory as the guy is 19 and lifts at 165. I’ll take what I can get.
This is how all my victories are. If you total 1400 at 198, my Wilks is better and you suck. If you total 1375 at 165, then you aren’t as strong as me. Imagine the cognitive dissonance if Wolverine had lifted without knee wraps.
Coming soon: Deadlifting, my new training program (pretty much same as old one), a few last meet observations (funny, i promise), and an exclusive interview with Wolverine, the man with the 1615 total at 181. (not really an interview – I asked him how he trained and stared at him while he warmed up.)