Workout #69 – Heh heh, huh huh

Wow, big changes in my blog that no one is going to care about.  First of all, this is the last numbered workout.  It takes a few seconds to make sure that the number is right, and that’s too long. I workout every day.  Just add one to the last one.  I figured 69 was a good place to stop.

The other reason I am doing this is because to anyone randomly visiting, a bunch of sequentially numbered posts is probably arcane and offputting.  I’m going to also try to add more amusing content to each post besides just my lifts.  Don’t worry, I’ll still have random posts that don’t have a workout log attached, like Gym Heroes.

Front Squat: 45×2, 95×2, 145×1, 195×1, 245×1, 285×1, 305×1, 325×1, 335; 265,270,275,280,285×1, 295×1,2 (8)

I failed 335 even though this teenage harlot was next to me doing some sort of butt exercise.  She was wearing a tanktop that was strategically ripped to show off more of her bra (and cleavage), and short shorts that were basically see through when she bent over (she was wearing a thong).  I would like to state that I do not blame her for my failure. Yes I was ogling her, but that has been shown to increase aggression. (And no, not during the actual set – the only thing that would have increased would be my chance of getting paralyzed)

Also, some guy came up to me and asked about the straps I was using to hold the bar.  I can safely say that he will never try this himself.  I get asked almost every day about the bands I use, what my neck harness does, and/or the fact that I bought my own collars (because my gym only has 3 barely-working sets).  Nobody has ever purchased any of these items.  Also nobody ever asks anything like, “gee, how come you are twice as strong as me and how can I get like that?”  I’m not saying that to brag, just that if some guy came to the gym benching 720, squatting 1000 and deadlifting 1020, I would pretty much follow him around and interrogate him until he punched me in the head for annoying him.

Push Press: 45×6, 95×2, 145×1, 185×1, 210×1, 225×1, 235×1, 245; 180×2, 185,190,195,200,205×1, 205×1 (8)

Another short workout (1:30) and had to vacate the power rack early because – a new powerlifter appeared in the gym.  He has his first meet in 4? weeks.  He is 220 and claims to total 1365, but admits to hoping to hit 1300 in the meet.  He trains conjugate style, and says that he might switch to 5/3/1 but is afraid that it will be too much volume.

Romanian Deadlift: 135×3, 205×2, 255×1, 275×1, 290×3, 205,210,215,220,225,230,235×3 (21)

I love this exercise so much.  I missed doing it and will not be away from it again.  Why do I love it?  Try this multiple choice:

A. Because it is a great workout for the lower back, upper back, hamstrings and glutes.

B. Because over time, I am copying Olympic lifters more and more in everything I do – look at this freaking workout

C. Because I have not yet gotten good enough to require eyeball-popping amounts of weight i.e. it’s easy.

D. Because I enjoy bending over and arching my back provocatively in front of the whole gym.

E. All of the above.

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