Commercials about nothing.

You, sir, are gay.

(SEC mandated disclosure: I am long IBM)

Have you ever seen the new IBM commercials? Of course you have, because they are on every 6 seconds during the NCAA tournament.

Nerd Scientist: 10.4 petaflops, that’s what our new computer can do. That’s one flop for every .083 people on the planet.

Ethnic man: Petaflops are help solving problems of our global society.

Woman: Like global warming.
Man: Terrorism
Child: Traffic congestion
Ethnic woman: Ze World Peace
Child: Disease
Man: Petaflops bring the dead back to life.

Woman: IBM is doing all these things. Building a better global society everyday through the technology of tomorrow.

WHAT? What are you selling me? What kind of commercial is this? Am I supposed to buy something? Or just have a general feeling of goodwill because of your babble? Think how much money you spent on these ads to sell me nothing. Next time, just set your money on fire.

Did you know that IBM helped engineer the Holocaust?

Or that Binghamton University’s Engineering Building and School, where I spent many of my formative years (though not as many as at the West Gym) is named after famous Nazi sympathizer Thomas J. Watson?

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