Above: Flynn and his fiance, Holly Last year I came home and went drinking with Flynn and his younger brother Alex. I’ve been friends with Flynn for a long time, but I’m also friends with Alex. When I’d come home from college, and Flynn wasn’t around, I’d hang out with Alex and his friends. We had a few crazy times. The most memorable was when I was about 19, I had a fake ID, and his friend was having a party, so I agreed to buy them all beer. They would have been about 16 at the time. I went to this shady store near Lincoln Park where they sold beer to toddlers, I’m sure. I bought cases of forties, and cases of Laser, the kind that was fruit flavored. We loaded them into the back of my mom’s station wagon (see that grocery wagon was good for something!) and went over to the kids house who was having the party. When we arrived, a Dazed and Confused situation arose where we knocked on his door, carrying crates of booze, and his aunt answered the door. Apparently, his parents didn’t trust him to stay home alone while they were gone for the weekend. We fled back to the car and drove away at high speeds. Back at Alex’s house, they were good sports about it, and still paid for all the booze. I suppose malt liquor will always be useful to you at some point while you’re in high school. We hid it in a spot in Flynn’s house where his brother and I before him also hid things. You could put bodies in this space. I’m not telling where it is, but it’s a good hiding spot. I mean this was a lot of beer, like crates and crates. They gave me a complimentary forty and a Laser to take home with me. I hid them in my garage and forgot about them. Probably 4 years later, my mom found them when she was looking for something, and called me to ask if I knew what beer was doing in the garage. At first I had no idea what she was talking about, but then I remembered. Of course by now, I was of legal drinking age, so the statutes of limitations had expired. I told her to throw it away, it had been out there for years, and probably had frozen and refrozen. She said that my father had it in the refrigerator, and was planning on drinking it anyway, which he later did. This is a guy who you’d think grew up in the great Depression. He’d not only cut the moldy parts out of a piece of bread or cheese and eat it, he’d probably try to cut the E.Coli out of a piece of meat if he knew how. Flynn and Alex are very similar, so much that it was uncanny, when I hung out with Alex, I felt like it was Flynn, and often had to catch myself from starting a story like “Dude, remember the time we…” and would have to change my words around to “Yo, one time Flynn and I…” They look a lot alike, talk identically, but they have slightly different personalities I can’t really articulate this properly. Still haven’t gotten to either drinking story over Christmas break, but readers should be entertained by these stories.